Since my last blog post “Who Asked For Your Opinion” the word “opinion” has been mentioned at home and work! You’ve asked for specific examples. So, I’m going to give you what you want! Whenever, the word opinion is used the preceding words AREN’T “thank you for your” it’s more like “who ASKED for your”.
I have so much to say…
I believe that you can say just about anything you want to anyone if it’s said in the right moment and tone! When I was ten or younger. My mother asked me why to do I talk so much and I responded, “because I have so much to say” and I do. At 36 not too much has changed! However, my approach has. I’ve learned to have tact and read the room before responding. Now, with that being said I’ve said some inappropriate things to the wrong people at the wrong time. Some of things I’ve said have been very offensive and I’m a little embarrassed about it. There’s no way I can possible detail all of the unwarranted comments I’ve made all in the name of “it just my opinion”. I’ll share a couple…
I worked in Retail a few years back I was like 22 & 23 and my Manager was a few years older than myself. She was cool and a lot of fun! One day she did or said something that I thought was ridiculous and I told her she was so juvenile. I didn’t think it was a big thing until a few months later I requested to change my hours/raise etc. and she mentioned that I called her immature, I corrected her and reminded her that I said she was juvenile and not immature. Needless to say things didn’t work out in my favor.
Another time I was at my friend’s place and she had a new sofa and I asked her “where’d you get this lil ugly thang”? she told me where… and that was that. A few months later my friend and I were hanging out with my co-worker who mentioned something about me and my “opinions’ and the two of them shared various times I’ve volunteered my opinion. I had an old friend and new friend swapping stories…it was bad! These were really innocent in comparison to some of other things I’ve said in other relationships.
I’ve made a lot of reckless comments in my twenties and beyond… my intentions weren’t intended to be mean. I just thought my opinion really mattered.
Some of the relationships in your life you have to use kid gloves and that’s ok. However, we all have relationships where you can be honest and real. Sometimes the people closes to you can’t handle the way in which you give your opinion. You have to have someone you’re accountable to…there should be someone that’s able to be real and raw with you, without you overacting. People don’t like to feel belittled, attacked or rejected. Sometimes, it’s best to sit back and listen. I’ve learned to pray about certain things before giving my opinion.
If your friend is trying to squeeze in a pair of shoes and you can see their feet is bleeding, I think it safe for you to give your opinion. Now if the shoes fit and you don’t like what they look like…who cares who asked you your opinion?
Hint Hint—> A. Wayne 🙂
Until next time…
4 thoughts on “Who Asked For Your Opinion: Part II”
The struggle is real! Lol
Very well written. I too suffer from the trait of brutal honesty. I’d like to think I’m getting better at keeping my opinions to myself but we both know I’m still struggling. A quote I always love about how you say it, not what you say:
“Tact is the ability to tell someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.”
Winston S. Churchill
I think your words are full of wisdom and your experiences. I to have had instances where I could have held my tougue and held my opinion thinking I’m helping or keeping it real. It’s easy to get offended and offend others . Some may feel criticism, However a friend should be able to accept honesty because thats a form of Love also. I’ve learned to walk in peace and avoid strife at all cost. It’s ok to give opinions but true, as you’ve said the delivery and tone is very important and pray before approaching.