Hey, In less than 30 days until my 38th birthday and just wanted to share a few words of encouragement!
Until next time…
Since my last blog post “Who Asked For Your Opinion” the word “opinion” has been mentioned at home and work! You’ve asked for specific examples. So, I’m going to give you what you want! Whenever, the word opinion is used the preceding words AREN’T “thank you for your” it’s more like “who ASKED for your”.
I believe that you can say just about anything you want to anyone if it’s said in the right moment and tone! When I was ten or younger. My mother asked me why to do I talk so much and I responded, “because I have so much to say” and I do. At 36 not too much has changed! However, my approach has. I’ve learned to have tact and read the room before responding. Now, with that being said I’ve said some inappropriate things to the wrong people at the wrong time. Some of things I’ve said have been very offensive and I’m a little embarrassed about it. There’s no way I can possible detail all of the unwarranted comments I’ve made all in the name of “it just my opinion”. I’ll share a couple…
I worked in Retail a few years back I was like 22 & 23 and my Manager was a few years older than myself. She was cool and a lot of fun! One day she did or said something that I thought was ridiculous and I told her she was so juvenile. I didn’t think it was a big thing until a few months later I requested to change my hours/raise etc. and she mentioned that I called her immature, I corrected her and reminded her that I said she was juvenile and not immature. Needless to say things didn’t work out in my favor.
Another time I was at my friend’s place and she had a new sofa and I asked her “where’d you get this lil ugly thang”? she told me where… and that was that. A few months later my friend and I were hanging out with my co-worker who mentioned something about me and my “opinions’ and the two of them shared various times I’ve volunteered my opinion. I had an old friend and new friend swapping stories…it was bad! These were really innocent in comparison to some of other things I’ve said in other relationships.
I’ve made a lot of reckless comments in my twenties and beyond… my intentions weren’t intended to be mean. I just thought my opinion really mattered.
Some of the relationships in your life you have to use kid gloves and that’s ok. However, we all have relationships where you can be honest and real. Sometimes the people closes to you can’t handle the way in which you give your opinion. You have to have someone you’re accountable to…there should be someone that’s able to be real and raw with you, without you overacting. People don’t like to feel belittled, attacked or rejected. Sometimes, it’s best to sit back and listen. I’ve learned to pray about certain things before giving my opinion.
If your friend is trying to squeeze in a pair of shoes and you can see their feet is bleeding, I think it safe for you to give your opinion. Now if the shoes fit and you don’t like what they look like…who cares who asked you your opinion?
Hint Hint—> A. Wayne 🙂
Until next time…
There’s so much obsession about weight loss and body image. Everyone wants to lose weight now and most women will go to any lengths to shed the pounds even if risks harming themselves. The media bombards us with imagery that we can never obtain because it’s not even real! Those images have been altered in some way to keep you always wanting more! We’re always trying to reinvent ourselves, we pluck, we wax, we stretch, the list goes on and on! If you really want to change how you look start with diet and exercise. There aren’t any short cuts to healthy living. You just work at it every day and if you have a bad day…start again and again until you’ve conquered it.
There are just as many men overweight as there are women. The thing is society doesn’t put as much pressure on men to shed the pounds. A man can grow out his beard, wears a nice suit and that will mask how society views his obesity. I’m not saying that men don’t struggle with body image because I know that that they do, however, how often do you see beauty ads for men in comparison to women?!
Obesity is a problem in the US for men and women and children. If you’re like me and you don’t like working out for hours in a gym try going for a run or walk. I’m really trying to put an effort into being more active but I learned that what you eat can be more effective than hitting up the gym a few times a week.
I’m guilty of over indulging in sweets and spending more time applying makeup and styling my hair than working out! To be honest, I don’t work out at all, but again I do enjoy a nice stroll! So… as I start my new weight loss journey. I have committed myself to changing up my diet, less sugars, more water, you know, the basics. I have a created a fun visualization on obesity and healthy eating using Pikotchart.
I spent two years of commuting from North Saint Louis County to Downtown St. Louis , for work . I was driving more than twenty minutes each way for work and my son’s school. The two of us were living in a 2 bedroom rental. It was a cute little 2 bedroom house. I had the luxury of having a driveway a designated office space and the convenience of having an laundry area in the basement! It was nice, plenty of space, but a not so great neighborhood! We needed a change and I grew up near the Downtown area, so it didn’t take long for me to make a decision to move back to familiar territory. This journey was a little different because I was losing a lot of space and privacy. But, I decided to make the the jump and we moved into a two bedroom apartment right in the heart of Downtown St. Louis, there is so much history and everything is right outside my door! I can walk to work, restaurants, shopping etc.
My son’s school is a less than a mile from our house. We went from our rental to sharing a 1 laundry room that serves 90 units! Don’t get my wrong there have been sacrifices. The driveway is now a distant fantasy and I pay for parking in an underground garage. Climbing three flights of stairs with groceries can be a challenge but also a great way to get into shape. I knew my son would be losing out on being able to go out and play in a “traditional” neighborhood but he loves it and he attends the Boys and Girls Club . There is so much diversity in the city, culturally, racially and economically. I want him to be prepared for the real world and be able to be around people who are different from himself without compromising his convictions. He has a long life ahead of him and so do I!
Until next time…