I spent two years of commuting from North Saint Louis County to Downtown St. Louis , for work . I was driving more than twenty minutes each way for work and my son’s school. The two of us were living in a 2 bedroom rental. It was a cute little 2 bedroom house. I had the luxury of having a driveway a designated office space and the convenience of having an laundry area in the basement! It was nice, plenty of space, but a not so great neighborhood! We needed a change and I grew up near the Downtown area, so it didn’t take long for me to make a decision to move back to familiar territory. This journey was a little different because I was losing a lot of space and privacy. But, I decided to make the the jump and we moved into a two bedroom apartment right in the heart of Downtown St. Louis, there is so much history and everything is right outside my door! I can walk to work, restaurants, shopping etc.
My son’s school is a less than a mile from our house. We went from our rental to sharing a 1 laundry room that serves 90 units! Don’t get my wrong there have been sacrifices. The driveway is now a distant fantasy and I pay for parking in an underground garage. Climbing three flights of stairs with groceries can be a challenge but also a great way to get into shape. I knew my son would be losing out on being able to go out and play in a “traditional” neighborhood but he loves it and he attends the Boys and Girls Club . There is so much diversity in the city, culturally, racially and economically. I want him to be prepared for the real world and be able to be around people who are different from himself without compromising his convictions. He has a long life ahead of him and so do I!
Until next time…
I haven’t blogged in a really long time and with all of the things happening in the US, there’s plenty to talk about. I have so many things to share, but I will keep it simple and focus on what’s been pressing at my heart.
I spent time with a really good friend of mine this weekend and we were talking about life, faith, family and community. She said something that really resonated with me…she said, “we need to turn our pain into purpose”. She’s right! With all the crime, racial and political division, depression, poverty etc. it is easy to get caught up in the hype of it all. We’re so focused on the presidential campaign that we’re forgetting people are still without basic needs, food, shelter, clothing.
This has been a really emotional year for me. With all of the many challenges I’ve faced this year such as; someone breaking into my home and struggling to replace the things that were stolen from my family. My eleven year old is now too afraid to sleep in his room or live in the house. The good thing is we live in a rental and the lease will be up next month. It’s been hard to pull up in front of a house that was vandalized and call it home. I wanted to break my lease and run away I felt so violated but, I had to press through and encourage my son when I needed someone to encourage me. Some of the people at work were shocked when I told them about the robbery because I kept smiling and coming in to work. You have to press through the bad days in order to get to the good days.
We all have something that we’re struggling with. We must move forward and redirect our focus from our pain and turn into something purposeful. Participate in a cause or group that shares your same life mission. Help others to overcome their fears and challenges. Start a group or a club with other like minded people. Do whatever it takes to start feeling better about life. Someone needs to know your story because it will give them hope and empower them to be free.
Until next time…
Allow Him to pour into you. Don’t compare your partner to the last person you dated or to your friends and family who went through something similar. Their experiences are helpful at times. However, you cannot walk in peace and reverence with God if you only refer to their experiences. You don’t want to limit what God is able do in your life. He will only operate within what you believe. So, if you believe all men cheat, then that’s what you will deal with. When you marry the person that God has ordained to be your spouse, you will need to grow closer to God and keep Him centered in the marriage, not the kids, routines, vacations, or another repair to your body or your house. Some people think, if we add another child to the family, things will be better for my husband and me. Or maybe if I get a better paying job. Maybe I should lose some weight. Or, when the kids get a little older, we will be okay.
The truth is you will be okay when the two of you seek God together and find out what he has for the two of you to do. Petition the Lord for an assignment. Be prepared for what he may show you. He may tell you to have a Bible study in your home. He may say that you need to slow down and seek Him more. Again, marriage is not about how the world views it. Look to God for discernment and know that marriage is God, man, and wife. They are one in the same, just as God is the father, the son, and the Holy Ghost. You can’t have one without the other.
Are there any family traditions or childhood experiences that have affected how you view marriage? If so, how did you work to overcome them? Do you struggle with commitment, and why do you think that is? Has God given you a mission for your marriage?
Until next time…
As a single woman in Christ, I’m waiting for God to bring my mate and me together. For a long time, I didn’t really understand what it meant to be one with another person. I memorized Bible verses on marriage, and I thought that was all I needed. I hadn’t ever seen a real godly marriage. I have heard people reminisce about the good man that they used to have, but I’ve never really seen people put in the work to have a successful marriage or relationship. I was raised by a single parent. I understand that sometimes, things don’t work out. Most families in my neighborhood consisted of a mother and one, two, or more children, who, sometimes, had different fathers. As a kid, I learned early on that, if it’s not working out, you have the option to leave.
I was proud that I memorized a few scriptures on marriage, however God wanted more out of me. He wanted me to learn how to avoid being a quitter. After spending time with God through prayer and heartache, I began to commit myself to God’s will and purpose for my life. God gave me understanding about marriage and how it related to me. I believe marriage is something I can be successful at.
Marriage is more than what we see in the world. It’s more than what looks good on paper and what a person can do for you. It is what the two who are married can do for God. You must truly walk with God in order to have a healthy relationship with anyone. You have to spend time with our heavenly father and let Him be lord over your marriage.
Until next time…